Howdy from the JV House in Houston! I don’t normally write on Tuesdays, but I am headed on retreat and have some thoughts before heading out. But first, time to meet another casamate!
Hey everyone I’m Andrew!
As you have probably already figured out, I live with Gabriela at Casa Ruti G. I am originally from Portland, Oregon, but before this I did a year with JVC in Detroit, MI. So, now I like to tell people I used to live in Detroit; It’s interesting to see people’s reactions to that. I am a self-proclaimed academic nerd because I love learning about things like theology and history. I especially love theology! I studied it in undergrad, discovered my passion for ministry, a love of Holy Cross spirituality, and after JVC I am going to grad school to become a hospital chaplain. One thing I like about living in Houston is that I can practice my Spanish! Shout out to Gabriela for helping me practice!
Well, it was wonderful to make your acquaintance, Andrew
P.S. I also work at Cristo Rey Jesuit of Houston as an assistant in the Dean’s Office.
Back to our regular scheduled programing:
This past week of work was an absolute whirlwind. It was the first week that I took work home physically. Lesson learned: there’s a reason work should stay at work. When I can’t separate myself, I can’t be present for my community. Subsequently, I don’t function well. It’s not a poetic lesson, but an important one nonetheless.
One of the reasons it was so hard though is because I had moments where I centered myself unnecessarily. Here’s the real lesson:
It’s not about me.
I had one of what might be the only wins I see this whole year, as a client that I have been working with finally made it to the US. I had lobbied the Y to use emergency funding to bring them over ASAP due to emergency circumstances, and thanks to some fantastic dedication on the part of a lawyer that I work with, they arrived in Houston this past week. Finally, this client gets to be with a family member they have not seen in over a decade. What a gift it was to be able to meet them. I was supposed to pick them up from the airport, but due to a series of events, it was just their family member that picked them up. While I don’t love admitting this, I was slightly disappointed at first that I couldn’t witness that reunion. But then I realized, it wasn’t about me.
I also had really hard moments with clients this week, mostly that centered around people who deliberately withheld information from me in order to better their asylum claim. It’s a HUGE problem, because in immigration, anyone who deliberately puts false information or deliberately withholds information for the intent of receiving an immigration benefit is permanently banned from receiving any immigration benefit for the rest of their lives. The US government does not give second chances.
All parts of me wanted to process the discovery of these lies with anger because anger is a known emotion to me. But I got hit with a metaphorical two-by-four with the reality that it is not about me.
I hope to God that I am never in the position where I feel the need to lie to protect my family and save my life. If roles were reversed, it’s super possible I would be lying too. So I’m left with an anger that is not unwarranted, but is wholly unnecessary. The people who come into my office need a lot of things, but my anger is not one of them. I simply must recognize, much like I said to my client earlier, that “no es bueno ni malo, es que pasó” (it’s not good nor bad, it is what happened). It’s what is happening. Given that, I get to decide how to respond. In my responses, I’ve been taught the following:
I’m not called to judge, but instead to seek justice.
I’m not called to wallow in self-pity, but instead to walk humbly.
I’m not called to lash out, but instead to love mercy.
While I have a crucial part to play in every encounter I experience, I am not the main character in other people’s stories. Full stop. So, in the wins, the losses, the late nights, the early mornings, the joys, the sorrows, the confusion, and everything in between, it’s not about me. It’s about us. And that changes everything.
Here’s to justly seeking, humbly walking, and mercifully loving…together.
Love,
Gabriela
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